I need him, you must understand
by LizDavidson
Summary: What if, during his marriage, Aaron Hotchner had gotten David Rossi pregnant? What if they'd had a daughter that Haley had agreed to adopt and raise? What if David was forbidden from visiting the child or even seeing her? What if he had to pretend to be "Uncle Dave"? And what if, when Haley died, Aaron starts up a relationship with Spencer Reid? How would David Rossi act?
1. I love him, but don't know him

**I need him, You must Understand**

 **Chapter one**

Summary: _What if, during his marriage, Aaron Hotchner had gotten David Rossi pregnant? What if they'd had a daughter that Haley had agreed to adopt and raise? What if David was forbidden from visiting the child or even seeing her? What if he had to pretend to be "Uncle Dave"? And what if, when Haley died, Aaron starts up a relationship with Spencer Reid? How would David Rossi act, when he discovers Aaron got Spencer pregnant? This is the imagining of that obsession._

David Rossi, legendary ladies man, was having an affair. David Rossi was in love. David Rossi was...pregnant.

He'd been having an affair for the past year with his married colleague, Aaron Hotchner, and had inevitably fallen for the other agent. What's worse was it was plain for all to see. When they were in the bullpen, when they were on a case, even just the way they went off to the bathroom for a quickie. David had fallen head over heels for Aaron.

So when he woke up on a case, next to Aaron as always, and immediately ran to the toilet to puke he was happy that he might be pregnant, that Aaron might finally be ready to leave Haley and come out properly as bisexual. He hadn't factored in that Aaron didn't love him as he loved Aaron.

The day came and he got into Aaron's car. "Aaron, we need to tell Haley about us...now..." Aaron stared at Dave.

"Why? Why, ruin a good thing now?" Aaron took Dave's face in his hands, "What's changed that you want to tell Haley now?" He was concerned, Dave knew what he about to tell him but he still got sick to the pit of his stomach. It just dawned on him Aaron might not feel the same way.

"Remember the case where I spent most of the time emptying my stomach in our room? Usually in the morning?" Aaron nodded, he'd always assumed it was from food poisoning. "Well, uh, we're having a baby..." Dave's smile disappeared as Aaron's hands were removed from his face and onto the steering wheel as he started the car. "Where are we going Aaron."

His eyes shining with unshed tears Dave waited for Aaron's reply. "Planned Parenthood." was the only two words to come out of Aaron's mouth. He looked furious.

Dave knew it was probably not for that but he asked anyway: "to confirm my pregnancy before we tell Haley?"

Aaron scoffed "No, to abort before Haley finds out." With that Dave's heart sank like a stone, Aaron didn't love him back and didn't want their child.

"Aaron , stop the car and let me out." Dave said, more forcefully than he'd ever said anything in his life, "I'm not asking, I'm telling you I want out of this car."

As soon as Aaron stopped the car Dave jumped out and didn't even notice that he was getting wet from the Virginia rain. Thankfully it hid his tears.

So this was his life now, trying to hide his growing belly from his colleagues and from Aaron, but at home he let loose. he held his little Bambino in his hands, felt them kick and toned to experience this with Aaron.

In the eighth month of his pregnancy he witnessed perhaps the biggest fight any of them had seen Haley and Aaron have, in unit chief Burgess' office. He'd been called in and Haley started to scream at him, he knew then that Aaron had told her. If Burgess hadn't have been there he can only imagine what Haley would have done.

In the end Haley said that David couldn't very well raise a baby and be an FBI agent, and he had to concede that fact, what she suggested floored him; let her adopt the baby and Aaron will acknowledge them as his own child. Defeated Dave nods. He knows it's for the best, but if that's true then why is his heart aching?

Finally on the 7th of November 1989 at 11 am David Rossi goes into labour. Since there's no birth canal it was always a c-section for him, but as he's about to go in Aaron and Haley arrive and seen Aaron's face makes him more determined than ever to have their child.

And so a daughter is born, and before Dave can see her they whisk her away, side she's being adopted there's no need to let him see her, but they don't understand that Dave's loved her from the moment he found out he was pregnant with her. "May I see her?" He asks one of the nurses, groggily. "To say goodbye?"

She looks to the doctor and nods, fetching the little bundle and carrying it over to Dave. He takes her gratefully and gently strokes her face, "Well, Bambina, it's our first and last day together. But don't worry: papa's putting you in Daddy's arms, You'e going to live with daddy..." at that point his emotions overwhelmed him and he started crying.

While he recovered from his surgery Haley and Aaron came and took the baby home with them.


	2. God help me, and my daughter

**I need him, you must understand**

 **Chapter 2**

On the 15th November at 8:30am David Rossi walked into the bullpen and eyed the concerned faces around him. Everyone knew that the 'surgery' had been his and Aaron's child being born, they were all profilers after all.

Donald MacCue came up to him at the coffee station. "I'd stay here if I were you, Aaron and Haley are at his desk showing off their new daughter. I think it might be too hard for you."

As he added sugar to his coffee he turned to the other agent, "Don, I'm not gonna fall to pieces seeing them playing happy families. Don't forget I signed away my parental rights to her. She's Haley's not mine." Although that was all true a part of Rossi ached to say that. It started to physically hurt the closer he got to Aaron's desk. "Hey Aaron, Haley. How's the little Bambina doing?" he tried to see her as a bundle in Haley's arms, all he could see was a tuft of dark hair.

"Little Maisie is doing just fine. She's settling into our house and you should see her drink from her bottle, little scamp." Haley smiled down at Maisie.

"Maisie..."David seemed to roll the name around in his head. "I like that name...suits her..." Haley's face darkened.

"Yeah? Well even if you didn't like it there's nothing you can do about it. You have signed her over to me...remember that." Dave looked down. "And no, you can't hold her." That hurt Dave more than anything else to be honest. Aaron looked at him apologetically, but nothin could make the hurt go away. Instead Dave crossed the bullpen and to started on his paperwork, his eyes brimming with unshed tears which spilled when he looked up and saw Don holding his daughter when he was all but forbidden to do.

On the next case he assumed he'd room with Aaron, and was disappointed when Burgess informed him he'd be rooming with Martin Compton instead. So Dave knocked on the door when he knew Don MacCue was at breakfast.

"I take it you don't want to room with me anymore." his voice never wavered but his bottom lip quivered with suppressed emotion. "Did I mean anything to you?"

Aaron looked down and then at Dave, putting his hands on Dave's arms. "Honestly? I felt, lust and really good while I was fucking you, but feelings? Like love? No. I didn't feel that. You mean more to me than you know. Maisie is amazing and I'm gonna love raising her. I'm sorry you won't get to but I really shouldn't have asked you to abort her...I'm sorry." And with that he left Dave in the hotel room to cry.

When Dad arrived home he made plans, set up a secret bank account and started saving up and within 3 years he was up $250,000 and should be ready to retire. He also had enough stories to write and sell some good books.

In those 3 years between 1989 and 1992 he'd watched Maisie being raised with him being called "Uncle Davie".

He stopped by Aaron in the hallway, "she looks more and more like you everyday...I see she has eyeglasses though, that's neither of us..." Dave was stopped when Aaron coughed and pulled out eyeglasses from his breast pocket.

Aaron laughed, "I have been inside you. I looked you in the eye when we fucked and yet, you had no idea I wore contacts?!" He smiled and looked into Dave eyes. "Is there a reason you stopped me to talk about Maisie?"

Dave drew in a shuddering breath and let it out. "For three years I had to watch you two playing happy families with my daughter, so I saved..." Aaron's head snapped up "..to retire early. So I don't have to see the man I love everyday take care of our daughter with the woman who he chose. I've already told Burgess what I'm planning, and Jason is letting me use his cabin until I get a more permanent place." He starts to cry, "You know what's funny? I signed my rights over so that I could stay an FBI agent but all I want now as Maisie with me...calling me papa..."

Aaron looked down, Dave's tears started to streak his face and he closed his eyes. All of a sudden he felt Aaron's lips on his and pulled back, "Are you sure?"

"it'd just be one time...I don't want to start the affair again but...I'm willing to give you a special, going away present..."

Dave scoffed and turned. "Well, I didn't think you'd start up the affair again but I thought you at least had some feeling in that body of yours..."

And having said his piece Dave walked out of the FBI building, never to return...

15 years later

Dave got a call, Jason Gideon was missing and Aaron was on leave with Haley, Maisie and Jack...they were begging for him to come back. He weighed it up, if Haley and Aaron had another child then what would have happened to him, was he still as beautiful?

Dave made his mind up. Seeing how Aaron turned out would be amazing and he needed to see Maisie...

Dave smiled at Aaron when he got there on Wednesday. He was then invited into his office when Aron started telling him. "Haley walked out...the job..." he sighed and Dave's heart leapt within his chest. "Maisie's 18...in November. She goes to college in the fall, Virginia Tech. She's so smart..." Aaron chuckles and pours himself and Dave a drink of bourbon and hands it to Dave who smiles at Maisie's school picture on his desk.

"She looks just like you." Dave smiled at Aaron. "I'm sorry she walked out on you."

Aaron shrugged, "To be honest I'm just glad she let me see Maisie and Jack," he takes a sip of his bourbon and looks at Dave, "She was already encouraging me to take a desk job for years with Maisie growing up but her getting pregnant herself made it worse. Shortly after Jack was born she made me choose: her or the job. I chose the job, got a divorce for dessert." he breathes out a mirthless laugh and instead, pulls the door open, "let me introduce you to the rest of the team."

Dave met all of the team except one, but he found out who that was when he heard the voice: "I'd love to pick your brain about all your cases..." Spencer Reid was rambling again, Aaron put a hand on his shoulder, to stop him.

"Spencer, you can quiz Dave on the jet...calm down." Aaron looked at Spencer with something in his eyes, made Dave feel sick. It was love.

Aaron kissed Spencer's cheek.

"We have a jet?" Dave didn't want Aaron to know he was still in love with him, not if he wanted to get close to him through Spencer Reid.


End file.
